A year ago today I was just a week away from leaving the country with no return ticket, I had a small carryon suitcase a lot of anxiety and no real solid plans beyond the fact that I knew I was going to spend a month in Tokyo. I figured taking that first leap and committing to leaving the country would be the hardest part but now that I’m home I am realizing returning back to the life I had previously is a lot harder.
Struggles of coming home after an extended trip
While traveling I met multiple people who had been away from home for years and either settled down in a new country or just adapted to hopping from country to country. I would have never thought that being gone for only 7 months, less than a year would change anything when coming home. Over the last 3 month’s I have struggled with being home and went from being homesick to being sick of home.
No one wants to hear it
This is one I already knew about after traveling for around 4 months in my early 20s, no one and I mean no one wants to hear much more than a quick summary of your travels. I am so self-conscious of being the pretentious prick who is constantly comparing everything to their travels “Well actually in South Korea they do this…..”, its the absolute worst. The honest truth is, its hard to talk about your travels without it coming off as being a braggart, but the issue is when its been your life for almost a year its hard not to. It reminds me of being younger, right after high school I spent most of the following year partying when all my friends who enlisted came home all they talked about was the military, it was nauseating and I could not care less but that was their life. The thing is everyone else’s life goes on even when your gone and finding things to talk about that don’t involve your travel life is difficult.
Cultural barriers affect how you communicate
This is one I did not expect, having spent my whole time abroad in places where English was not the first language effected how I talked to people. Sure in Thailand people speak great English compared to places like Japan or even Korea but you still have to simplify how you talk and exclude a lot of cultural references or weird puns. After 4 months in Bangkok, I started simplifying my English and talking a lot slower, I did not notice until a few friends pointed it out when I came home that I was still doing it. My conversational skills have taken a bit of a hit since being back, the fact that I didn’t spend 8 hours a day talking and joking around with people was probably part of it.
Glamorizing past relationships
About 3 months after being gone I would have friends message me saying they missed me and asking when I was coming home. It made me really think that maybe I made a mistake and that I had an amazing network of friends back home. Compared to the few friends I had while traveling this really got me thinking I wanted to come home. After coming home I realized the few times those people messaged me were the few times we would likely hangout each month anyways, which was not a lot. In retrospect, I created some great friendships while traveling that were just as strong as the friendships I had at home.
What next
Maybe it’s just a reoccurring cycle of being homesick, then travel sick and the grass is always greener on the other side. Its October again and with my recent career change all I can think about is how I can travel again, so I’m more or less in the same spot I was last October.
